And that's where the positive review 2022's Marlowe.
What an execrable piece of awful scripting, terrible acting, inconsistent photography, weak pacing, bad shot composition, and (except for wardrobe) derivative art direction.
Other than that? It's a must see!
Liam Neeson, who really is getting too old for this, is the titular character. Diane Kruger is Jean Harlow . . . who has changed her name for the purposes of the film to Cavendish. Jessica Lange is collecting a paycheck.
But thank God for Colm Meaney, Danny Huston, and Alan Cummings. At least they're fun to watch.
Kruger shows up in Marlowe's office. As per previous slipshod attempts at resurrecting film noir, it's a missing persons case. Her lover, Nico Peterson (Played with a lack of effort by Francois Arnaud) has disappeared, or been killed, or fled L.A., or been kidnapped, or something.
The next 90 minutes of screen time is devoted to Neeson resisting the charms of Ms. Kruger; Ms. Lange; and navigating a noirish plot so Byzantine that The Big Sleep should be lauded for its clarity.
Eventually, after 65 dead bodies (including Neeson, Kruger, and Lange), 47 shoot outs, a geriatric car chase, and countless coincidences, the film arrives at its merciful end. The only resolution is Marlowe will now have someone to drive him around, and there's a new studio head in Hollywood.
If you are looking for something confusing, but well directed, acted, shot, art directed, and paced, please find somewhere The Big Sleep is available.
But Marlowe is a hard pass.