THE NURSING HOME DEATHS . . . BROUGHT TO BY ANDREW CUOMO
Another pitch for a series starring one of the worthless Cuomos. This one happened to bump off a few thousand senior citizens . . . and so far he has gotten away with it.
A few days ago, I suggested that Netflix follow up the documentary on the execrable Jeffrey Epstein with one on the reprehensible Sonny "The Ventilator" Cuomo. So far, nothing but crickets chirping, but since the only way to fail is to give up, I refuse to give up.
The pilot starts with Sonny's childhood, learning at the bent knee (ahem) of his useless father, St. Mario, also a multi-term governor of New York. Mario Cuomo served 100 years in Albany.
Maybe it just felt that way.
Later in the opening episode, St. Mario relinquishes the crown, and George Pataki, a sorta Conservative, comes in and sorta balances the budget, sorta improves the economy, and sorta cleans up St. Mario's various messes.
But alas, New Yorkers are a collection of the dumbest voters this side of California. As soon as they saw "Cuomo" on the ballot, like programmed Zombies they pull the non-existent lever for the leg-breaker.
PRESTO! The thug moves into the governor's mansion. The balance of the pilot is about nothing, a la' Seinfeld, since Sonny did just that for years, prior to winning his 8th term, or whatever it is at this point.
Then CV19 shows up and the governor has to engage his room temperature I.Q. As a Master of Style Over Substance, he holds press conferences, at which Sonny Cuomo threatens New Yorkers with death if they don't wrap themselves in aluminum foil and fortify their homes with garlic and Zika-level insecticides.
"Flatten Da Coive!" "Ventalatuhs!" "Flatten Da Coive!" "Ventalatuhs!" Cries Sonny Cuomo, insisting if New York got a zillion respiratory assistance machines, and leveled the cases to the Marianas Trench, you might be able leave your home in 2025.
Towards the end of the pilot, Sonny joins his developmentally disabled brother Fredo Cuomo in a series of interviews. The two of them discuss pertinent issues such as meatballs, Mom, and knee-capping Republicans.
And as a tease into Episode 2, Sonny issues another edict.
Given his inability to do basic math, he sees rising CV19 cases in the nearby states of Arizona, Texas, and California. Uh, Sonny doesn't understand 4th Grade geography either. He threatens to quarantine anyone coming into New York.
I wonder if that will include Fredo, who ignores Sonny's instructions on a daily basis?